And so the season begins....

As we arrived at the pitch, we were met with the spectacle of three athletic teenagers practising reverse-stick undercuts into the top corner of the goal. Ah! the zeal of youth, we all thought, smiling at their exuberance; it was only after a few seconds that we realised, through dewy eyes, that they had an alarming success rate. No cause for panic, we rallied, they're only young, and surely experience will out over unseeded talent. Perhaps it was a tact to intimidate their opposition as they made their way to the touchline? The beating of spears on shields, the raising of dust, a paean to rouse the troops... we could surely adopt a similar enterprise for our home matches? However, it was suggested that the sight of Moppett pinging balls over the fence with wild abandon was not likely to instil much awe into the away team.

Valley defend a short corner

In what was probably a first in club history, we were blessed with all three Thames Valley Men's resident goalkeepers. This unholy benediction proferred the choice of Kit, Chipfat or Gihan. A gruelling selection process ensued: Chipfat was eventually awarded the pads, as he had turned up with them. Besides, Kit had just bought a new stick for the princely sum of £30, and he was determined to make it pay for itself.

We warmed up, managing to keep the lost ball-count to a minimum. As we were waiting for a late arrival or two, Bomber Command gave us instruction on how we were to play, and where. Well, and on the pitch, to summarise. We had a mature back line in Bomber and Bacon, with Bull Piddle and Smithy providing width. Gihan took the bottom of the diamond, ably flanked by Lob on the left and JC on the right. Moppett planted himself at the top of the diamond, with a steely resolve to move as little as possible. Up front were Fish Junior Junior and Kit. Due to a non-show, the opposition kindly provided us with two umpires, allowing us to play with the full complement, and thereby not affecting our tactical mastery.

Mr "Purple Socks"

The game commenced at a lively pace, more due to Sunbury's youth than Thames Valley's experience. Moppett was soon dubbed 'Purple Socks' by one of Sunbury's defenders; he had had worse descriptions. The Sunbury attack was fast and fluid, but Valley managed to fend them off well. On the contrary, we looked confident as we began to play the ball around. Our midfield worked closely together, and produced some formidable play leading into Sunbury's 25. Lob made some good runs through the middle, laying off to JC, who played some neat one-two's with Moppett. Kit proved that he had his uses further up the pitch, and even found himself in the D with the ball. However, desperate to exact his pound of flesh from his new stick, his final strike had a rather vegetarian feel to it; but after all, this from a man used to letting goals in, not scoring them.

Rob starts another mazy run

Our first goal was conceded from a short corner, which found its way in without a great deal of skill, and it could be said that Valley did not really deserve the deficit. So, at half-time, one-nil and everything to play for.

The second half began with the same gusto, and an early goal from Sunbury, which took some of the wind out of Valley's sails. Still, we kept our spirits up, despite our flagging stamina. Sunbury created attack after attack, which our defence parried with diligence. We conceded several short corners, at times the D resembling a shooting gallery.

We still strung together some notable attacks, with Moppett finding himself running into the D (at pace) with the ball. Sadly, with all of his energy devoted to the run, little was left for the final shot, which was miscued with aplomb. Two more goals later, and the match ended. However, it was not the usual down-beat Valley that left the pitch; regardless of the scoreline, we had all put in a solid effort. Fitness might have let us down in the latter stages, but we could take many positives from our open play.

The final thought came from JC:

"Three keepers on the pitch, and we still lose four-nil"

[Ed: Thanks to Jane Simms for her photographic skills ]

[Ed: Thanks to Moppett for the match report ]